Get Adobe Flash player

San Miguel de Allende — Ciudad Muy Bueno

August 16th, 2018 · Tags: Arts · Cities · Coffee Shops · Uncategorized · Wi-Fi

 

Many times I question my decision to do The Dirty Gig to fund my travel.  But as I headed north of Celaya, Mexico to San Miguel de Allende, Mexico I was convinced that doing disaster recovery work is worth it for the travel.

San Miguel has never been on my radar before, and yet Conde Nast Traveler selected it as the numbero uno city in the world a few years ago.  I’d say I got pretty lucky in coming to this part of Mexico, oddly enough, to work on robot computer controls at an automotive factory, damaged in a flood.

 

San Miguel de Allende

So … the first day off, I headed north.  Immediately, as I headed out of Celaya the land seemed to take on an agrarian beauty ….  rolling hills with low mountains in the background, corn and other crops nearing harvest … and after another fifteen minutes of driving, the countryside transformed to wine country, with vineyards on both sides of the road.  There between the rows of grapevines was the first new, well-paved rode I have encountered in this part of Mexico.  A strategic tourism ploy, I am sure.  There were many hardcore bicyclists out on the road too, attacking the foothills.  Impressive.

 

Everywhere else in Mexico the roads are in serious decay, except for the ever-present speed bumps.  Motorists really have to pay attention to keep from knocking out the front end of their rental car.  The chug holes seem to be the antithesis of the speed bumps … pretty much the same size, in the 180-degree opposite.  Based on the driving skills of some of the commuters I have seen, the speed bumps may be the smartest thing going here.  The only time people slow down.  Ha … there is always a funny sign to alert folks that a speedbump is near.  It looks kind of like an abstract, dark set of boobs on a yellow background.  The first time I saw the sign, I thought I was approaching some swinging beach.

Back in Celaya, the streets are a hodgepodge of disrepair, mixed in with a few street hustlers, here and there.  Some are pretty  creative.  For instance, if you park at Wal-Mart, a covey of bucket-carrying cleaning guys will surround your car and insist on washing it for a few hundred pesos.   Elsewhere, I have seen a teenage girl juggling in an intersection, hoping to make coin between green lights.  There have also been ambitious-looking father and daughter acrobat teams doing “up-on-my-shoulders” tricks for change.

But my favorite panhandler?  Remember the world-class potholes I mentioned?  The other day I drove past a young man, weathered and thin, but sporting a beaming smile.  He had a shovel on the side of the road and was shoveling gravel and some hot asphalt from heaven knows where … and had taken it upon himself to fill in potholes.  Will pave for food.  Very creative, and so mutually beneficial.  People were funding his endeavor.

So, anywho … the roads to San Miguel improved along the way.  Then when I hit the scenic, historic city, the streets retrogressed a couple of hundred years … shrinking down to one small lane between multiple-story buildings, paved with seemingly ancient cobblestone.

 

As luck would have it, following sporadic instructions from a finicky GPS (again), I wasted no time in heading down a one-way street the wrong way.  It wasn’t busy, and cars were parked on both sides, turned every direction … so I wouldn’t have noticed my infraction, had it not been for the police officer chasing on foot behind my rental car.  Thank goodness I saw him and I didn’t see any night stick pounding on my window.  I pulled over and apologized profusely in broken Spanish, and yes … played the “Stupid Gringo” card — or SGC.  He was quick to recognize my stupidity was sincere and was merciful, allowing me to turn around.  Nice guy.

 

The next road I took led me high above the downtown plaza, to a scenic overlook.  There was parking there, and I snatched it up.  No sooner had I climbed out of my tiny rental, that a family beside me asked me to take a tourist shot for them.  What a great icebreaker, these cell phone cameras.  My new friends are from Guatemala, and were all too happy to tell me about their beautiful land and live volcanos as we shot tourist shots.

I think the older women were sisters on vacation, and they had their young niece with them.  She served as interpreter for the group and accordingly earned herself a PingWi-Fi t-shirt.  Very nice people.  Two minutes later and a couple from Texas stopped me to chit chat.  Friendly place.

It was about a mile downhill from my parking spot to the main plaza.  Oh my … the bells of the magnificent cathedral were sounding off in the distance below as I hiked down the narrow sidewalk.

Just as I notice a strange pipe sticking out of an old two story building, an unknown liquid shot out of it onto the sidewalk and street below, narrowly missing a couple of pedestrians and a car as well.  Kinda unusual.

Everywhere there is old adobe-like brick, stucco, vibrant colors and rooftop gardens … a great walk.  The city is surrounded by mountains and it is a hike up the hills.

After circling the plaza a few times, I started peeking inside the surround shops and galleries.

Everywhere, there are dolls and statues and posters of the eyebrowed one — Mexico’s favorite artist, Magdalena Carmen Frida Kahlo y Calderon.

 

Frida

 

Frida y pollo

Just a little off the square was some sort of reception facility, and I saw a group of people sitting around the second-floor inner courtyard.  At first glance, I thought the people sitting in rows of chairs were in a church service, as they watched some speaker on a television screen.  Soon, I found out that the people were watching an address by a visitor to the Guanajuato International Film Festival or #GIFF.

I looked for t-shirts but saw none, but the film festival poster was pretty interesting, so I inquired.  It wasn’t for sale, but they said they would give me one … and … in fact, the poster designer “was right over there.”  He gave me a poster, and how could I resist getting the artist’s autograph on the piece.

 

In addition, I met the executive director of the festival, Sarah Hoch from Kansas, a 40-year ex-patriot American.  Nice people.  Good luck with the film festival in the future. (San Mighel de Allende is in the state of Guanajuato.)  The festival features events in two cities, San Miguel de Allende and Guanajuato Capital.

Sarah Hoch, executive director

 

GIFF Film Festival

With my new film festival poster, signed sealed and delivered, so to speak, wrapped up and protected in two venti Starbucks cups, I moved on.  Funny, Starbucks would only give me one cup … ha … I had to fish a second cup out of the trash bin … but I washed it.  I digress …

 

On a more positive note, so far, Starbucks Wi-Fi here in Mexico has outperformed my own Starbucks — one of the swankiest new stores in Fort Worth’s ritzy Clearfork area … just sayin.

 

Ha … I also wandered/stumbled into the filmmakers lounge somewhat by accident.  So tempting to engorge on free food … too bad I am on a diet.  Oh the pastries!

 

In an ongoing quest for THE perfected Mexican souvenir t-shirt.  So far, I am undecided, but tall of the wrestling mask t-shirts are calling my name.  We’ll see …

 

As I had heard, San Miguel is full of ex-patriot Americans and former Europeans as well.  So there is something really familiar about the place, despite its colonial period charm … cathedrals, plazas, street vendors juxtaposed with nice boutiques and fine restaurants.  I wondered into one cool restaurant and ordered the almond crusted trout (with a side order of molé sauce, which raised an eyebrow or two).  Pretty delicious and the presentation did not disappoint.  The filleted trout was buried in almonds, up to the neck.  Do fish have necks?  Anyway, up to the … oh, up to the gills, I should say.  And at that point was the fish’s cute little head still attached.

 

Starbucks in San Miguel was a happening place, overlooking the most interesting sculpture in town, a favorite selfie destination, judging by the lines of people shooting photos in front of some winged, archangel type

Did your mom ever tell you not to play with your food.  Ha … she wouldnt if it still had a head.  I stuck the fishhead on the top of my water bottle throughout dinner, twisting it off every time I took a swig.  Stupid gringo!

 

Ha … then about three quarters through the meal, I looked down and to my horror found out I had been walking all over the plazas of San Miguel with my fly open.  Stupid Gringo.  No I know how the  ex-patriots who came up and introduced themselves knew that I am an American, right off the bat.  This ugly American set the bar pretty high.  So embarrassed.

Know what I sayin?

GPS — Gringo Peso Shortage In Mexico Wi-Fi Travel

July 16th, 2018 · Tags: Airports · Cities · Coffee Shops · Wi-Fi

Welcome to Mexico. Unlike just about every one of my friends, I had never been to the true resort areas of Mexico, merely some border cities. Still haven’t …

However, today I woke up in the heart of Mexico, three hours northwest of Mexico City in the cuidad de Celaya. Celaya has all the traditional “South of the Border” flair you would expect — cathedrals built in the 1500s, and indigenous mummies interned slightly prior to that, for example.

But there’s also a modern, one-world kinda vibe here, rocking to the tune of Japanese and American investment — automobile plants, and the Western retailers/hotels that follow hot on that money trail.

This morning’s activities — a field trip to the local health clinic for immunization against diphtheria (I think) and tetanus. I explained that I just had a tetanus immunization on April 4th to combat bad juju from one of the puncture wounds from a motorcycle mishap. My employer said without documentation, I would have to go under the needle again. Ha … I pleaded “Well, could you at least use the same point of entry from the previous needling, since it has barely sealed up from “the other day.” They were not amused.

Yesterday was a trip. Very similar to my introduction to Puerto Rican culture a few months back, we landed and hopped in a rental car and only a few miles down the road encountered spotty or non-existent cell phone coverage … or phone company handoff issues … definitely technology lost in the translation.

That was a problem. Not only did we lack cell coverage, by the same token … no GPS service. So, despite the fact my co-pilot and I had four phones between us, we had no navigational assistance. Ha … for foreshadowing, the last night in the U.S., I had called up Google Maps and looked at the route. And, even though I “knew” we would have GPS, I saved a screen capture of the Google Maps route “just in case.” So, in effect, on drive day we at least had a digital photo of a map, although it was not interactive. Sounds old-school, right? IF I ever use this as a contingency again … note to self … drill down to get a little more detail on the map.

Also learned … exchange some dollars for pesos as soon as you land. We learned the hard way that tollroad booth guards in the interior of Mexico are not as excited about U.S. dollars as their counterparts along the border.

As we drove west of of Querataro International Airport, Highway 45/450 was easy enough to see on the picture of a map, but our exit for the town of Celaya was not. We kind of just missed the Celaya turnoff and our hotel there. We traveled another 50 kilometers or so, before we knew something was wrong. Lo and behold, at that very point, cell coverage kicked in and I quickly made an impassioned plea to my girl SIRI and she gave me — in a not-so-loving voice — the directions to The Hampton Inn. Good girl. We had reservations at a Hampton Inn. However … not just any Hampton Inn. We headed for the hotel SIRI found, anyway. Thinking, if nothing else, we could use the mission-critical Wi-Fi there. Nope. That hotel was not our hotel. Furthermore, we had a slight language barrier — despite my good marks in Ol’ Señor Thompson’s Spanish class in high school. The hotel crew really couldn’t tell us how to get to the Hampton back in Celaya. All of this was complicated by the minor fact that the address we were given for the hotel was incorrect. It’s the little things.

That’s when the van driver, who spoke some English offered to lead us back on track. I thought, “Man … you do know how far back we have to drive?” He said, “no problemo” … It was on his way to the casa. (Do you like how I pepper the dialogue with some lingo authentico, here and there?) So we hopped back in our ever-so-tiny rental car and expected the wrong-Hampton courtesy van to pull in front of us.

Surprise!

The Good Samaritan driver was actually a Good Samaritan rider. He whipped in front of us on a small adventure bike motorcycle … a bike that had seen better days. But then, one should never question the vehicle of their deliverance, right? My new best friend in Mexico — BFIM — sped onto the dusty, crowded, busy street in front of us … fearless. Immediately I noted two things: You meet the nicest people on motorcycles! And, man I liked his motorcycle helmet. It was cap-like, with a brim in front … very much like the small/cool hard hats that workers wear on the job in Asia. His headgear also had an elastic band down around his chin to hold it in place. As we inched up close to the biker at an ALTO sign, the truth was revealed to me. I saw the small insignia of Major League Baseball on the back of the solid blue helmet. He was wearing a souvenir helmet from a game! Safety First!:)

So picture my companion and I cruising through a dusty suburb of Salamanca, Mexico … of course … dodging potholes, wild dogs, bakery cart vendors … amidst the madre-y-padre fruit stands, and the faded-but-colorful, stucco, two-story buildings and bars and cinder block shanties — most of which sported a half-dilapidated Coca-Cola painted logo, flaking off … We were on a mission. Ever see Harrison Ford and Willem Dafoe in the CIA thriller “Clear And Present Danger” where the good guys’ motorcade had a motorcycle escort through village streets … and there are bad guys with rocket-propelled grenade launchers on top of their shoulders, lining the rooftops … for a Latin American ambush. Ha … we looked like that, as we proceeded with our motorcycle escort through the backroads of Mexico.

Not bad … only a few hours in country, and PingWi-Fi has a motorcycle escort … I digress …

There are motorcycles everywhere, sometimes sporting a family of four, in transit … in the same reckless style seen on the other side of the globe.

I stopped to shoot a photo of one guy and his Lucky motorcycle, as he inflated the tire with a hand pump.  Big day for handpumps.  I also witnessed a little bicyle cart vendor stop in a major intersection to air up his tire.  Guess if you need air, you need air.  Traffic be damned!  I digress …

Later, driving around, but getting close to our destination, we found ourselves at an impasse in a tiny, shady looking urban area. A long freight train had the gall to block our misguided path. And just as we stopped, some pedestrian positioned himself in front of us and a car pulled up close behind us. We were kind of trapped. What a perfect scenario to separate this American fool from his pesos. But, this time luck favored PingWi-Fi. No trouble.

Then finally, we got a cell signal, called a coworker who sent us the correct coordinates for the hotel. It seemed so simple after all the hassles. But, we did see some Mexico beyond our comfort zones.

Hours late, we checked into the brand new Celaya Hampton Inn. It’s nice … I have stayed in many hotels throughout the States with lesser accommodations. Best of all, the Wi-Fi is killing it at The Hampton so far.

 

After check in, it was when I peered out of my third-floor window that I saw the most unexpected sight in Mexico so far. Background: on our drive though heaven-knows-where earlier, we had seen some very Latin-specific, modern, colorful condos that looks like jumbled, erratic, modern/modular structures — all the same … same same … hundreds of them … very much more of an architectural statement than just a place for Mexican yuppies to live. Well … now, behind my hotel was yet another take on “cubism” just outside my window. Behind the Hampton was a new, large food court under the big top of some industrial-strength awning. The big top of this “Arabe Comida” place was not that unusual. But the underlying structure was assembled with stacked up, repurposed metal storage vaults — Conexes or Mobile Mini storage units. Very cool. Within the encampment were Mexican eateries, Asia delicacies and more.

Asian. There is a decidedly Asian influx here … most apparent on my Asian-manufactured television in my room. First I was a little surprised there are absolutely zero U.S. channels in the offering. The programming is 95 percent Latin American programming … with one Japanese channel mixed in. Ha … after watching Hispanic programming long enough to recognize that Ol’ Señor Thompson must have graded too lenient in my escuela Spanish classes … I flipped over to the Asian programming. That was when I discovered the rock ’n’ roll tour de fems that is Band Maid. Band Maid is apparently very hot in Japan … a girl-group, five or six strong, all young, hot, leggy, Asian women playing searing guitars, screaming out repetitious English lyrics, and banging out precision rhythms … all dressed in somewhat scanty French Maid costumes. Oh … I also caught some pretty intense sumo wrestling on the channel too.

Man I love cultural exchange.

Meanwhile … as we wait on standby to get into and work at a local automobile factory — The Dirty Gig that brings me to Mexico — I made a beeline to one of three Starbucks within striking distance. Thank goodness … my phones are playing nice on Mexico’s cellular grid now … so no more problems for now. Starbucks crisis averted. Found it.

 

Starbucks — fully Wi-Fi equipped, thanks to Cisco/Meraki Wi-Fi … Get this … the Wi-Fi here in Celaya, Mexico (in what many consider to be a “Third World” country) is better than the Wi-Fi back home at “my Bux” — a beautiful new cafe in a multi-million — if not billion-dollar development — in Fort Worth, Texas … in the ritzy, glitzy Clearfork area. However … things are still bigger in Texas and the other states … Here in Celaya, I ordered a “venti” black tea and received what we call a “grande” back home. Sounds like some exchange rate issue. But soon, I had squatting rights atop one of only four easy chairs in the joint. Mi coffee shop es su coffee shop. Another minor issue with Starbucks Wi-Fi in Mexico. Apparently NAFTA doesn’t work for Pandora. “No streaming for you Gringo!”

Know what I sayin?

One Of The Best Wi-Fi Hotspots In Austin, Texas

July 13th, 2018 · Tags: Cities · Wi-Fi

Sometimes, you just gotta have Wi-Fi and kava kava. Put your chill mask on. #ATX

The Weird Science Of The ‘Like’ – #SocialMedia

July 6th, 2018 · Tags: Arts · Satire

 

 

 

“There is more to life than making apparently obvious observations”

– Jerry Seinfeld

 

Before this blog is read, Facebook, Instagram, Google+, etc., will have reworked something new into their social media blueprints for world domination (just when we thought we had this whole thing figured out.) But we play right along …

How has this happened? Why has social media taken over the world? I suppose lots of people still talk on the cell phone, at least they do when they are in a quiet restaurant or coffee shop where it is considered to be gauche. (Are gauchos ever gauche? … I digress …) But most people I see are finger typing away, or dictating spoken word into their cell and letting the device figure it out.

For me, it’s a natural thing. I think faster and convey the message more efficiently if my fingers are involved in communicating … you know writing, not “shooting the bird.” But everyone else — lawyers to sanitation workers to computer network engineers and pastry chefs and cowboys are also pounding out the letters right there beside the writers of the world.

Of course I have a theory. All about social media and “The Science of ‘The Like.’”

Social media is that elusive fountain of youth. Texting appeals to our inner adolescent. Remember passing notes in class, back when kids used paper? I think texting is like that. Just as, back in the day, a clever multiple-choice note scribbled on a folded piece of paper was the way to catch someone’s attention, now a clever text speaks volumes. It’s relatively private, delivered on a need-to-know basis, ha … unless you really screw up. Thank goodness there is no teacher/monitor to snatch up our texts and read them aloud …

Yep. Social media …the texting part anyway … it’s like passing notes in schools for the new millennium!

OR … option two … social media posting is of course total competition … whoever gets the most red numbers wins.

Imagine a scenario where “the provider” in a household comes home to their spouse, after a long day at a social media agency. “Man, I crafted two thousand tweets, instagrammed fifty-seven pics and added a dozen “my stories” for clients and only got twenty ‘red numbers’ all day.” Long day.

Remember when “like” was just a meaningless word at the beginning of a hipster’s sentence? As in, “Like dude, you totally overshot the putting area with that approach shot with your flying disk.”

Like is so much more, now. Likes are the currency, the riches, the spoils, the plunder of social media. So The PingWi-Fi research team has put together an account of the things we’ve observed — techniques, strategies, trends and the like.

 

 

Meanwhile, what’s with replacing the little red numbers on my Facebook app. with dorky little Taco Bell-shaped notifications? Yah, what’s with the red bells? … bells hell … I implore you FB. Keep those red numbers coming … I digress …

As scorekeeping goes, I rather like what Instagram does to get my attention when I have just scored a point — a floating red number hovering over a white heart, with a red-dot footnote. In my opinion, Instagram “kicks out the jams ‘expletive’” when it comes to showing your most recent scores.

Of course it’s not just Facebook. We all look for our daily numbers on FB, Twitter, Instagram … Snapchat too, I presume.

Whoever has the most red number totals at the end of life wins. Period (or you’d think).

Perhaps the most manipulative of all, some people may strategically stay off of FB for a while, then post the most uninteresting thing and get 300 “likes” due to their absence/fondness quotient or AFQ.

Sometimes, there’s no rationale for why one post “had roast beef and another had none.” The haves/have nots of likedom. For instance, maybe you climb a mountain in Timbuktu and plant your great grandmother’s shawl and the family Bible that her great great grandmother brought over on the Mayflower high upon the peak … and the photo you post gets a mere 25 likes from your 2,700 friends.

Meanwhile …

Alice posts her 567th photo of Boots The Cat sleeping, and her 2,700 friends “like” the candid shot 750 times, and share it with their friends 335 times. (You look immediately to see who the dumb asses are that you count as mutual friends, don’t you? … Just sayin.)

Where’s the rhyme and reason?

 

 

What’s the deal? How does this popularity-vs.-merit algorithm thing work? To get loads of “likes” does one just need a better deodorant? Does one need to post more puppies? Is one — shall we say —a little too “outspoken” on Facebook, affecting their scores?

But, even if a person overposts every day, by keeping their nose to the grindstone and pounding out 300 posts in four days — with only a few “likes” — they can get just as many total as a more tasteful poster … And at the end of the day … it is all about quantity, right?

Maybe some of this is making sense … Then out of left field, suddenly the red numbers are just not what they once were. Now Facebook adds in what I call diluted numbers. I am starting to see red numbers on my scorecard when certain friends merely “scratch their head online,” or so it seems. “I didn’t do anything to deserve that red number. I don’t take charity!” Come on Facebook. Don’t devalue the red numbers, like some third-world krugerrand.

And besides the scoring … whatever it is that has fueled the popularity of social media … there are so many new rules of etiquette and questions of acceptable behavior … and many grey areas … even strategies … with many important decisions before we just rush in hully gully and start throwing our “likes” around like an NFL player “making it rain” at The Kentucky Derby with hundred dollar bills from their latest bonus.

Let’s talk about the flip side of collecting red numbers. The act of doling out the red numbers — the liking and therefore making someone’s social media stock go up. It is the equivalent of your vote — in a yes-or-abstain format. How selective are you when you like? Do you practice discretion at all?

Don’t get me off on a pure “like” compared to a mouth gape, a red face or a heart “like” …

Do you sometimes just see the source and/or the topic and “like” something without reading it? And have you seen some of the poorly written crap that people on both sides of the polarized, politicized world “like” and share when they see a rough version of one of their speaking points? And how about politicians … for two hundred years, politicians knew to kiss babies at political rallies. If politicians would post and tweet pictures of kissing babies these days, it would be a better world — but they would also probably be arrested by some pop-up lynch mob.

Are there certain friends who can do no wrong, so they get a near-automatic “like,” no matter what they post? Conversely, are there people who couldn’t squeeze a “like” out of you with a vise?

Would you admit it if you had fallen into a “like” stampede, lemming-“liking” along with the trend and hitting whatever else, whoever else “likes?” And what about when you notice a friend has already beaten you to the cheese? Repeatedly? Is there a point where you have to stop “liking” things in their wake? How long before the friend and others think you have become a “rubber stamp” liker? “If Janey likes it, then Kent likes it …

Some just jump into the 10K “like” posts, just to feel part of a group, I suppose. But what does it accomplish?

Are you one to take the “liker’s leap” … Maybe you see a post that is somewhat questionable, but you kind of like it. Do you boldly jump out ahead of the herd and “like” a post that has been up for a while, but has no skins on the wall yet, so to speak?

Do you ever suffer from “liker’s remorse?” … changed your mind about what a friend said, but waited to take back your “like.” Be careful with, but also realize the power in friend “liking.” IF you want to curry favor with your friends, you need to get in the game early and “like” their post when they have only a few “likes.” They will see you, early on, when you like your friend’s soon-to-be-viral post … like in a pyramid scheme, if you get in early, it’s good to be you. Once your friend has big numbers, your “like” gets lost in the shuffle, and you get very little friend points. Another way to think of it — “‘Like’ low, sell out high” — liking a friends post early to be seen by said friend, but removing after the numbers swell because you actually thought their post was silly.

Have you completely lost your soul to the red numbers games of social media? Do you find yourself calling out numbers like at a dice game, when you are looking to see how many red numbers you have … “Come on five. Come on five.” The “like.” The social barometer … isn’t it fun? Do you wake in the middle of the night to look at your phone for little red numbers beside your name on Facebook. It’s so addictive … competitive … perhaps Pavlovian. And fun!

Wouldn’t it be nice if there were a primer, to de-mystify the social media magic that is “The Like!?!” Well, here’s some of that, but also some telltale signs you may have a problem with the red numbers or that you have gone astray …

For openers, I give you the “breakup like.” It’s when two people are no longer in love, but they continue to dole out friendship, “moved-on likes” to be civil. P-LEEEEEEase!

Do you donate “likes” to worthy causes … or on the other hand, do you ever stop short of “liking” because the item is so popular already? “Hey they have 27K likes already, they certainly don’t need mine. I will go find some other well-deserving post who could use a helping hand.

Yep. I confess. I have been guilty of the sympathy “like,” because no one else has “liked” a friend’s post … But also, I’ve done the empathy “like” because whatever is described in the post, has happened to me.

Social media prods us “be the first to like.” Yes, now that’s when you feel a sense of accomplishment, when you are the first to like a video of a poodle doing laps in a jacuzzi.

Being first is big. But there are other red numbers that I find more interesting. NumberSpotting — jump on the “like” button if you can be the No. 500 “like” … ha … Example: my college recently was #10 on the 10th day of the year … YES! I was “like” number 1010 and I would have been really mad if someone had got in the mix to remove a like and erase my claim to somewhat-greatness. I hit the button with glee when I see I am about to be someone’s 500th “like” on a post. Nice, round, number milestones are important, so I jump on those opportunities … and usually, I will also post that “I am 500.”

OH ha … I was reading another post about Texas Tech in the College World Series, and happened to notice that my “like” tallied number 806, for the Red Raiders. You bet your arse, they heard about it in Lubbockland that I was number 8-0-6 … as in “THE 8-0-6” … the territorial nickname for the school, based on the area code, yo. Be on the lookout for those obscure numbers too.

Slightly related, what do you call this? Does it deserve a name? Maybe “stepping on someone’s line?” Has this happened to you? When you get in a thread where people are contributing one-liners or their best pun … and so, you’ve racked your brain and finally you post a really good pun. Then, as soon as you post, you realize you have not read all of the previous posts, including the three times your joke came up previously. Hate that. No choice but to delete in shame.

So many new phenomena in social media. This one — one of my friend’s term — is borrowed from other walks of life. It’s “the death announcer” — you know that person who always calls you up when a not-so-close friend has passed. “I got it. I got it. And I gotta report it,” as one of TV’s Sweathogs used to say. The social media equivalent of “the death announcer” has to be the people racing to be the first to post that some obscure or even a big celebrity has kicked the bucket. “Funny … just last week, I didn’t care about that actor in the least … then I realized, that by dying, they could get me lots of red numbers!”

As with the “death announcer,” there are so many new things derived from social media. Have you experience a brush with virtual fame yet, in the most insignificant way? I first learned of this euphoric feeling after I saw a small terrier roaming the streets and temporarily sniffing around my backyard. He got away before I could corral the little fellow … but later when I saw the little vagabond on the “social hood” site, NextDoor … I felt just like I had won the lottery and met a celebrity. Yet another wonder of social media.

Final word on “Likes” — “beware The Beastmaster!,” I always say. I refuse to like anything — even if it were the cure for cancer — if there were already “665 likes.”

Know what I sayin?

The 10-Year Anniversary Approaches

July 2nd, 2018 · Tags: Arts · Wi-Fi

PingWi-Fi, Same Same As It Ever Was

June 5th, 2018 · Tags: Satire · Wi-Fi

 

August 24 will be the 10-year anniversary of The PingWi-Fi blog.  How time flies.  … Just wanted to take a second and say “thank yo”  to all the friends and family who have continued to read along over the years.

Because of you, the blog will continue its goal to seek out and explore new Wi-Fi worlds … but more than that … to digress frequently, and to remain as irreverent as ever.

Whether dressed in a blingy tux or doing the long-haired motorcycle thang on the side of the road, it’s the same as it ever was — we simply just do not care🙂 We hope you feel the same same.

 

Know what I sayin?

Pitching Names For New Texas Baseball Team

June 1st, 2018 · Tags: Cities · Satire · Sports

 

What’s in a name?

I know people. And some of those people like to name things … imaginary rock bands and maybe a country band name or two. My most recent, Tire Swing … I digress.

One’s name, or brand is important … trying to exalt your name above all names (of your competitors that is).

Geez … sports teams are no different. They need a great name — strong/fierce, perhaps an animal or a bird of prey, something with geographical or historical significance. Some sports names have a sense of humor too.

Case in point, my college roommate’s intramural football team was called Vomit & The Groceries. I never heard the story behind that name, and I don’t think I want to know. I digress …

All this is leading up to, I want to name it with you (reference to an old rock band, simply called Bread) …

So … today, a lot of us are playing the name game because of a new Texas League baseball team coming to Amarillo, Texas. The team’s power brokers (Pawn Brokers is taken) decided to have an online contest to name the team. Participants were invited to visit a special Website and contribute, for a chance at season tickets, etc. When the deadline passed, the team posted the five “best” options for people to vote. Keep in mind, many minor league team names have a creative sense of humor and the most zany special events.

Conference on the mound … In my PR career, several times clients considered contests to let their customers name a product. Great idea to engage their target audience … however … however, you must be prepared to accept the results!

Please tell me this is some brilliant, guerrilla stunt … kind of like the bogus introduction of “New Coke” to draw attention away from a slight change in the soft drink’s original recipe, back in the day. (Oh by the way, speaking of guerrilla … Did you know the Trent, Texas high school mascot is The Trent Gorillas? Love that! Why!?!)

 

 

Ha … some really weak pop song playing at Starbucks now has inspired me “The GiddyUps.” I digress …

So without further adieu. The powers that be in Amarillo say these are the best they have to show for their efforts:

(Ha … perhaps the front runner) The Sod Poodles, which they say is an old nickname for a prairie dog … ANYONE ever heard that before? Anyone? It begs the question, was Prairie Dogs already taken, so they had to go with a prairie dog alias?

Then there is the Amarillo Boot Scooters … no doubt the team would run onto the field as the PA system belted out George Strait’s better-known, lesser-quality version of the old Terry Stafford hit — “Amarillo By Morning.” Hmm … morning or mourning? In the ’60s the best band in The Texas Panhandle was The Undertakers … I wonder if they would give up the rights for the baseball team to be The Undertakers. It might come in handy if the team was “in the cellar” … I digress …

Anyone ever borrow the cartoon name, The Underdogs???

Another of the “Top 5” — Amarillo Long Haulers … no comment, “Good Buddy.” Hmmm … all the real cowboys I know call it “Bull Haulers.”

By the way, if one of the final options was your entry, my apologies and I hope there is a cure for your condition.

Then there’s Amarillo Bronc Busters … I guess you break a horse, but you bust a bronc, but you can’t make him drink … and you can’t tuna fish … meh.

And last, but not least, Amarillo Jerky … I think someone just wanted to have Sasquatch as the bleacher creature mascot. (See jerky TV commercials …) Careful not to abbrev. and get in a legal entanglement with Steve Martin. Can you imagine the jerk-laden, off-color derivatives for creative hecklers?

So anywho, this name game is all over social media … and I don’t think people are “laughing with” Amarillo … if you know what I mean. This makes me sad. I love the place and especially its more-rugged Texans. But … you really wonder why the rest of the state ignores the actual north Texas?  On the other hand, in Amarillo’s defense, here in the Metroplex we have one of the world’s richest men who did excellent re-branding of the old, tired Dallas Mavericks.  The new look, color and logo are very dynamic.  One problem:  The Dallas Mavericks’ logo is now a horse, but a maverick is a young bull.  Close.

 

Could I do better? I don’t know … but I thought I did. But for me, there is “no joy in Mudville.” I was distraught that there will be no season tickets for me … “Casey struck out” so to speak. Hmmm … does minor league baseball have a Mud Daubers team? Wish I had thought of that, so it too could have been overruled.

Mud Daubers update:

My actual entries:

The Amarillo Cadillacs or Amarillo Caddies (shortened if needed, to get around potential lawsuits). Let’s face it. Love it or not, The Cadillac Ranch put Amarillo on the worldwide map. Visit it sometime and just count the European tourists at the art installment out near old Route 66, The Mother Road … Ha … I almost said “Mother Lode,” the name of the first bar I ever went to … over in New Mexico … And hey, if an Argentinian ska band can be The Fabulous Cadillacs … then surely Amarillo can be The Caddies. You do know The Fabulous Cadillacs and their video “Matador,” right? Crud. Adrian, Texas already beat Amarillo to the name Matadors

Man I love this video … even though I speak little Argentinian, I understand this video better than the Amarillo name selection process:

Speaking of Mother Roads and Mother Lodes, one of my other entries was The Amarillo 66ers … like a smaller version of The 76ers … ha no … to pay homage to Route 66 … the most famous road in the world that ran smack dab through A-Town … The road where rock bands went to “get their kicks.” I delight in the fact that even The Rolling Stones covered the old Route 66 song … and I gotta tell you, no offense George, but no one sings “Amarillo” like Ol’ Mick Jagger! The trouble with this name — The 66ers — surely someone smarter and faster has already claimed it … I am Googling. Crud. It figures. There is a team in the Dodgers system called the Inland Empire 66ers … pretty catchy that first part … out in San Bernardino. Factoid — Ken Griffey Jr. played for the team briefly, when it was still called The Spirit. In addition, the team has also been affiliated with The Seattle Mariners … that explains the Griff part … sounds like a personality crisis to me, Buster.

I take some comfort in knowing 66ers was already taken. Nothing new under the …

How about The Amarillo Adobes — nickname Dobies? … NO … not Doobies … that’s a different tune. One of, if not the most famous battles in Texas Panhandle history were the two Battles Of Adobe Walls, the second pitting Quanah Parker and his tribe vs. soldiers and buffalo hunters, led by a long-ball hitter named Dixon. Good stuff … Dobies. Imagine that in baseball font … and remember The Texas Plains had few trees, so most early settlers lived in DUGOUTS (see what I did there?,) sheltered with adobe or sod brick … Sodbusters would be better than poodles, I have to think.

But like I was saying, the historic battle was a double header. Here is the story of The Second Battle of Adobe Walls:

Adobe Walls Battle

A friend pointed out that minor league baseball has a storied history of crazy names to draw attention. I am okay with that … but there is crazy creative … and really stupid. Yes, we all know there is a Mudhen in baseball lore … And I think no one will ever top the Albuquerque Isotopes celebrating the rich New Mexico history in the atomic weapons race. (Did they inspire the band name Uranium Savages?)  Hmmm … Amarillo has a piece of that history too, since “Bomb City” as many call it, is the final assembly point for U.S. nuclear devices at Pantex. What about Panhandlers … too easy? Ha … or “Manhandlers” if that is even allowable in this new, woman culture.

There is a movement afoot on Facebook to name the team The Ospreys, logically, because that innovative helicopter is also produced in Amarillo. It’s not real creative, but it makes a lot of sense.

WHO were the judges?

The Mother Road

May 28th, 2018 · Tags: Uncategorized

Brothers Of The Road, The Mother Road …

Just This, Then Moratorium On Windmills … Already

May 24th, 2018 · Tags: Arts · Coffee Shops

 

I had said I would try no more windmill video tricks.  I lied.  Maybe I need a windmill support group.  After all those years of making cracks about black-velvet paintings of windmills … I tried to get out and they sucked me back in.

 

 

Little Movie Set That Could

May 23rd, 2018 · Tags: Arts · Cities

This has kind of a down-home feel about it.  A Folk Art video take on what has become a nice museum.