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No Wait Wi-Fi & Toyota Tactics For Road Warriors

December 8th, 2011 · Tags:Satire · Wi-Fi

Hmmm … can I write a blog in the time it takes Toyota of Fort Worth to inspect my Toyota Highlander? You know, one of the vehicles deemed unsafe by the Chevrolet/Obama administration, publicized all over page 1 in the press and then exonerated in the back of the newspapers a few months late … after Toyota was dealt a huge financial blow for being a good, competitive product.

… I digress.

Ha … I just got back from a three-month blitz to California, New York and Pennsylvania for The Dirty Gig … then shuffled off to Amarillo to see the family and watch it snow.

A funny thing happened on the way to The A. Bored, as I drove, I started reading all the gauges and stickers. Good thing. The state vehicle inspection sticker had been out for two of three months I was on the road … tucked away in my garage. So, driving my vehicle for the first time in months — I was illegal.

I pulled over, got out of the car, raised my hands and gave myself up. No takers!

So I got back in the car and headed north.

And Mother Nature was down with that. She helped me avoid the law — an accomplice, as it were. Luckily, I had learnin. I had to pull out an old college trick, while in Amarillo. What was it? Well … since you asked … I learned as a freshman that when it snows you can scrape 70 percent of the ice from the windshield and leave the inspection sticker buried under the ice. See … I did learn something in college.

So, until the snow thawed on the drive back to Fort Worth, I was cruising under the radar … so to speak. Using snow stealth technology.

As the sticker became more and more apparent, I reverted to technique number two. Staying right — to make the vehicle further away from any law enforcement eyes on the opposite side of the road. Additionally, I made dang sure there was always a car in the left lane beside me as I zipped through the speed traps that are also known as Claude, Texas … Estelline, Texas … and yes my favorite two names Chillicothe and Quanah, Texas respectively.

No tickets!

I thanked the powers that be and parked the thing. Then this morning, I was up at four to pack for the trip to Thailand. Ha … almost the land of Toyotas. I leave Friday. For once in my life, I was first in line. When the doors of Toyota went up. And yes, my newly inspected, neglected, rejected, non-infected, blah, blah, blah Toyota will be stored …. legally … back in the garage of PingWi-Fi world headquarters.

Meanwhile … i have been impressed for years that ToyotaFW has Wi-Fi, free, easy, accessible for their guests in the waiting area. And get this … these crazy tech savvy Toyota types are also using Apple iPads to do the paperwork during the service appointment. Pretty cool.

Toyota of Fort Worth — after multiple visits and much use of the Wi-Fi hotspot … I have finally blogged about it. Great hotspot, cool cars, nice, nice service people — 6 pings. (A near perfect score … A catch 22 … one point deducted because not only did I write a blog … I had enough time to post it too.)

Sawasdee!

Know what I sayin?